This morning, we see Jesus teaching the Pharisees and his
disciples about marriage. The Pharisees tended to be quite liberal with
divorce, allowing a man to do so for pretty much any reason. That might
surprise you because typically we think of Pharisees as being very strict,
often at the expense of mercy. Indeed, at the time of Jesus, there was a divide
among the Pharisees over this issue. Some held to the permissive view, others
held to a stricter interpretation. Hence “they were testing Him”—to see what
side of the aisle he would fall on.
* * *
If we are going to understand Jesus’ teaching on
marriage, we must have two keys in our possession.
The first key is Jesus’ emphasis on community as manifested
by the children. Jesus abruptly ends His lesson on marriage by telling his
disciples to let the children come to Him. Since children and marriage are
connected, Jesus is highlighting that, in the debate on marriage and divorce,
the Pharisees have overlooked a whole demographic of people that are integral
to the community: namely, the children. That the disciples are actually physically
preventing the children to approach Jesus only highlights the reality that
divorce and adultery hurts children and also the community. We’ve seen that in countless
psychological and sociological studies.
So, when Jesus says, “Let the children come to me; do not
prevent them,” He not only effectively puts the debate to an end, but gives the
most convincing reason to avoid divorce and adultery.
* * *
The second key which helps us to understand is Jesus’
call for us to consider The Beginning—that is, to consider Adam and Eve and the
period before The Fall. It is there that we see God commenting upon Man’s
situation and Man, in turn, commenting upon the creation of Woman.
About Man, God says, “It is not good for man to be alone.”
Man is made for an Other; he is made for communion. This makes sense since we
are made in the image and likeness of God—God who is not alone, but who is
Three Persons, and therefore the First Family. Man is made for this; he is made
for family. And not for a man cave.
About Woman, Man says, “at last, this one is bone of my
bones, flesh of my flesh.” In the Beginning, Man sees Woman as his equal in
dignity—literally made of the same stuff from which he is made. It is only
after The Fall that there enters the domination and distrust between the sexes.
Yes, while Eve is called Adam’s “helper,” it is not a derogatory title, but the
same title that is used to describe God the Holy Spirit in the New Testament.
* * *
What can we gather from this very brief reflection on The
Beginning? Simply, that marriage and family must be considered and pursued in
light of some of these basic truths: namely, that we are not made to be
islands, but families; and that men and women are equals in dignity. As the man
and woman discover these realities, they arrive at an understanding of
themselves, of the world, and of God that is greater than the sum of their
parts.
Therefore, when Jesus invites us to consider The
Beginning in the context of the debate on marriage and divorce, He is inviting
us to see the beauty of what marriage is and can be: it is the very civilizing
force of society; it builds community by way of the family; it is unifying and
uplifting most
especially when the man and the woman see their own and their spouse’s incredible
dignity and then seek its multiplication. For they can heal each other’s hearts; they can put a human face to
divine love; they can image and cooperate in the very re-creation of the world
in such a way that goes way beyond what was enjoyed in The Beginning.
It is “for this reason a man shall leave his father and
mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”
It is for this reason that Jesus upholds marriage when it
was threatened by the Pharisaical culture of His time.
* * *
And so Jesus says to them,
Amen, I say to you, whoever does not accept the kingdom of God like a
child will not enter it.
This is a call to be trusting like children—like the
children that were coming to Jesus that day to receive His blessing.
Yes, we can trust Him for all things are possible through
Him. He multiplied the loaves and the fishes—will He not multiply the small
love we have? Will He who calmed the storm not bring peace to your home?
You received a Holy Sacrament from Him on your wedding
day. Do you think that He who raised the dead would let that fire of divine love remain dormant
forever? Let us call upon the graces of the Sacrament you have received! Let us
run to Him!
In a particular way, let us pray for the Synod on the
Family that is starting today in Rome.
Let us pray for the renewal of marriages and families in
our community and in our parish.
Let us all come to Jesus as did those children on that
day. For it says,
He embraced them and blessed them.
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